Either there is no God, or there is and He’s a dirty son of a bitch.
My parents called us, late last night, just as we were drifting off to sleep. They called us to give us the news.
My grandmother’s belated bone scan — they were supposed to do it a couple weeks ago, said that they did and it was all clear, but did not actually perform due to a paperwork snafu — is all kinds of no good. Her lung cancer is now making a home for itself inside the bones of her pelvis. It’s bad enough that the world gives a lifetime non-smoker lung cancer — but it just adds insult to injury that she conquers the lung cancer only to have new tumors in her bones.
I hate the way that sounds. “Tumors in her bones.” What a horrible, horrible thing that is for a person to suffer. Just thinking about those words makes my skin crawl. There is nasty stuff growing inside my grandmother’s bones.
What kind of benevolent, all-knowing deity puts that shit into your loving, caring, wonderful grandmother’s bones?
Damnit.
- Mood:bitter
- Music:Nine Inch Nails - “Something I Can Never Have”
Tags: family naughty-words rants thoughts4 CommentsPrint This Post
4 responses so far ↓
Dude. I’m sorry. Shit growing in one’s bones when it shouldn’t be is a BAD THING. That’s what my Dad’s cancer does/did, I think. I know it at least made his bone marrow go from normal, runny Jello consistency, which is easy to extract and test, to wet sand consistency, which is EXCRUCIATINGLY painful to extract. I can commiserate, you and your family have my sympathies.
I can’t speak for the viscosity and texture of her marrow, since I don’t know all the grisly details — my information generally gets sent by email to my parents, then forwarded on to me, and I never really have a chance to talk to my dad about it much. Nor do I know what they are planning to do treatment-wise, besides having her on morphine to control the pain.
But thank you for your sympathies… it does mean a lot to me.
I’m very sorry to hear about that, and I want to pass on my sympathies as well.
I am very sorry to hear of the new developments with your grandma. None of the cancer survivors in my family have had their cancer metastasize like that, but it is something that we all fear could happen. You have my deepest sympathies.